artist/band: The Civil Wars
telly on: on everything Josh Hutcherson
soundtrack: Summer House - Gold Motel
flick: Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961)
book: Star Girl - Jerry Spinelli


"The fool looks at a finger that points to the sky."

- Amelie





You know I love you, don't be a fool.

Kira de Ocampo. Singer-Songwriter. Creative Writing student in UP Diliman. I am basically a grandma inside a 21-year-old body.



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the doldrums ? uhm.. i dunno. today's a very mixed day for me. happy slightly desperate in a subtle melancholy kinda way.
the dance ? oo - updharmadown
the lexis ? "di mo lang alam..."
the periwinkle sky ? sam j. drohid


i've loved him for as long as i can remember. perhaps, in a way, i still have the exact same feelings when i am with him. the feeling of seemingly acquiring the butterflies when he looks at you straight in the eye. the feeling of taking hold of your breath when he's beside you. the feeling of impair and vast gloom everytime you just wish he knew, and that he feels the same way as you do. but you do know in fact he's incapable of that for certain anonymous reasons.


and i admit. i still do. love him.


i watched him stroll toward the car with a yellow shirt on that fit him perfectly. his hair was apparently striking, as if he just had it combed. his eyes were as eager, arriving diminutively late for a date. okay. so that's a little extreme. a meeting.


a guy friend had fun watching him wander off farther, not knowing we were inside the car. it was rather amusing how he called me up,for yet the second time, to inform me that he has arrived.


sighing, i jumped out of the car with my friend. it was a first that it was up to the three of us to make it happen. the music happen, to be exact.


we hopped inside the music room as soon as we pulled in the place. the session was indeed a productive one. usually, when we all get so confused, it gets cocky, which is the main reason why we were dawdling in adding up original materials to the band. but anyway. i filled in the bass, and even though we were only three, he said we sounded better. LOL. well, that's mutual. infact, even parallel.


it was cool. we were cool. it was fun. we had fun.


he kept making fun of me of how fragile i appear. as i have always been. i kept making fun of him of how tall he is. but of course. i do like him that way. i have this peculiar attachment for tall gorgeous guys. he liked the new song that i wrote, unknowingly that it was actually for him and no one else. he participated well in the arrangement. he even said it was great. it was a deep compliment for me. i felt great, too.


he tried impressing me in his astounding and astonishing means. and i seem cannot find what they all mean.and i cannot deny. he's amazing.


the session ended, and we hanged out by the streaming heat of the sun for a couple of minutes, and talked about heartbreak catastrophes and the likes. until my friend decided he should be going since he himself has a date of his own. the two of us just followed him anyway.
then he asked me how in the world am i going home alone, since my friend has to go already in a separate way. i told him i'll be doing fine commuting all by myself. he said no.
i said yes. he's so stubborn, and he asked me to hand him my mom's phone number. i said no. the guy's still as stubborn as ever, so he asked my friend. whom is also his friend. and he got what he wanted.


wrong dial.


haha. so, i soon gave in, handing him my phone. with triumph, he called my mom and told her to pick me up. i took the phone, and told her not to. he said no. so my mom just told him to take me home. i said i don't want to.


but he did.


we rode this fx taxi to a stop three-fourths away from home. the taxi only had two seats left. right at the back. where it's crowded a lot of times. especially with the two big people sitting beside us. and his guitar. he offered the fare ride home. although i did try to pay him back, he did not allow me to. he actually held my hand to tell me i should not. twice. i felt the tingles in my spine rush.


i unattentively stared into space for a couple of minutes, and he asked me if i was alright. i told him yeah. but i wasn't. i wanted him to believe that. he then tried taking pictures of me, i've always successfully shoved it off. he never got a good angle. LOL.


i felt as if that ride with him to tikling was indeed rather short and i wanted to take over the wheels, and drive away with him. but, as always. fantasy gets me. we stepped off. and heard a jeep conductor call out a way home.

he told me if i will be alright if he gives me the ride home now. i asked him where he will go. home, he said. and so i thanked him, and hopped on board to a typical jeepney ride. to my home. i thought he already left, but then again he peeked at the window, telling me to pull my shirt down because my darn hips are showing.


was he actually looking at it? LOL. now that's funny.


i waved him goodbye, smiling ever so secretly, my blood still rushing it's way up.


he left me restless.


he left me speechless.


he left me breathless.


he left me feeling that exact same feeling i had.


two years ago.



safe sailing,
katy.*

Labels: ago, exact, madrid, two, years

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